In “Whistler,” author Ann Patchett invites us to consider all the events from our past, from our childhood, that we have forgotten. And most of us do not remember huge swaths of our childhood years; perhaps certain impressionable events stand out, special birthdays or celebrations. Holidays or coming of age parties might be memorable. But we can’t remember everything. If this brilliant novel were a person, you would describe that person as soft-spoken, intelligent, thoughtful, and charismatic. It would be someone you would want to make your best friend.

Daphne Fuller experienced a traumatic event when she was nine years old. But after the event, she had no one to talk with about it, so the memory of it faded. But when she and her husband Jonathan were visiting the Metropolitan Museum of Art, they ran into Eddie Triplett, who at one point, was Daphne’s stepfather for several years. The culmination of his stepfatherhood (although that isn’t really a word), was the night of the traumatic accident. After the hospital, Daphne’s mother cut off all contact with Eddie. That was yet another trauma as both Daphne and her younger sister Leda loved Eddie.

So now, Daphne is an adult. She’s actually an older adult and her husband, seventeen years older than she, is in his seventies and retired. Eddie is an octogenarian. But seeing him and talking to him brings back the feelings she had for him as a child, and she wants to renew their relationship.

Eddie is thrilled to do that, and when they meet his friends, he calls her his daughter. But Daphne knows he only does that because her actual father is dead, so Eddie doesn’t feel it’s disrespectful to her father to do so. Eddie is like that, polite to a fault, thoughtful, generous, and kind. Eddie listens and understands. But also, as we find out, both Daphne and Eddie are flawed humans. Aren’t we all?

Daphne’s husband is out of state cleaning out the family house after his mother’s death. He and his sister are wading through memorabilia and keepsakes, some worthless and some valuable. It’s a tedious and thankless job, but it’s also rewarding to come across some family treasures. So Daphne is alone in their house, and it’s summer, The private girl’s school where she teaches literature is closed and she is able to see Eddie and reconnect.

There is much that happened after the accident that Daphne did not know. Eddie fills her in on some, but also asks that she talk to her mother about some of the story. Eddie and her mother met when they worked for a publisher. Eddie was, and still is, an editor. Her mother was a publicist. They became good friends and eventually married, but the marriage only lasted a few years. Later, her mother married one of the authors whose books she had been a publicist for. She had two more children, both sons, and Daphne felt estranged from that family.

What we come to see over the course of this touching and tender story is that our past is filled with important moments that we probably will not remember, but which have lasting impact on the rest of our life. People do things for reasons we may not understand, and if we did indeed understand, we might not agree with those reasons. Yet we love those people anyway.

The title of the book, “Whistler,” is the name of a horse whose heroic actions save the life of her person. Whistler’s owner sent their story to Eddie as she thought of writing a novel about it. And although Eddie thought it would be a great story, the person decided not to share that story with others. But Eddie told that story to Daphne the night that they were stranded in the car on a snow-covered mountain, alone.

There are recurrent themes of defying death, forgiveness, and loss. But throughout the story there is a rich undercurrent that demonstrates the power of love. The characters, but Daphne and Eddie most of all, look back on their lives and think about how different choices would have impacted the trajectory of their futures. But after all, we are the culmination of the choices we have made, the people we have chosen to love and consider as family, and the streets we have decided to trod. Patchett’s writing makes our heart ache, but also fills us with wonder.

This review was first posted on Bookreporter.com.